The first step to knowing yourself

"Find a group of people who challenge and inspire you, spend a lot of time with them, and it will change your life forever." – Amy Poehler

Have you ever felt a moment where you were feeling stuck in a slump, or consumed by self-doubt and negative thoughts? We know it’s easy to believe that no matter how hard we try, we're always falling short. But sometimes, all it takes is a fresh perspective from someone who truly sees us to break free from this cycle.

Recently, during a particularly low moment, a friend asked me, "Do you know what your best quality is?" Caught off guard, I responded with something facetiously negative.

My response didn’t phase her, she simply answered with her thoughts on my best quality, as though she kept this response locked somewhere in her back pocket. Her answer was something I would have never guessed myself.

“You always make everyone feel so special and seen.”

It was so simple, yet it made me feel validated in a way I had never experienced before. I even felt a tiny shift in how I feel about myself.

This got me thinking: each person on our "team" – or as experts call them, our "support system" – would likely have a different answer to this question, based on their unique relationship with us.

It's crucial that we learn to see ourselves through the eyes of our team. But how does one begin to do that?

1. Identify your team: Look around at who you speak to and interact with regularly.

2. Ask the question: When you're comfortable, ask them what they believe your best quality is.

3. Listen deeply: You may not even recognize yourself in their words, but trust that they see you in a better light than you've ever seen yourself.

4. Document and display: Write down their responses and keep them visible, like on your phone's background or a sticky note on your laptop.

They could be as simple as "you always show up with a smile," or "you know how to make everyone laugh."

Remember, we all have best qualities, and more often than not, it's hard to identify them within ourselves.

Embrace the power of seeing yourself through the eyes of those who support you, and practice being that mirror for others. Watch as it transforms your journey to connecting with your well-being.